Breast is Best! (if it came with instructions)

 

You often hear people light-heartedly complaining about how we don’t get an instruction manual with our babies. The fear of bringing your baby home is a very real and tangible thing but, as we settle in to home life, our instincts do kick in and we all get the hang of it…eventually! This is with one exception, in my humble opinion – the wonderful ability we women have to not only sustain life, but to give our babies the best possible nourishment. That’s right! Fantastic, natural, timeless breast-feeding! How can something so natural possibly go wrong?

Long before I was pregnant, or even considering children, I assumed that I would breast-feed any babies I may have. Ready-made milk, fully portable, supply on demand, no bottles, no formula, never mind the unique bonding experience, what’s not to love, right?? When I became pregnant, one of the first things I noticed attending the antenatal clinics was the absolute barrage of posters and leaflets about how breast-feeding was best for your baby. Next I started being asked at the clinics, BEFORE I had had my baby if I would be breast-feeding. What?? How does that affect my ante-natal care? Anyone considering bottle-feeding their baby would be on a serious guilt-trip before even giving birth. As my answer was ‘yes’, I didn’t really think much more about the ‘breast is best’ offensive. Equally, as it was as natural as breathing, nor did I give any thought to ‘how’ I would breast feed..

Three weeks earlier than my due date, I gave birth to the most beautiful baby anyone had ever seen, and it seemed breast-feeding was a doddle – just place her beside the source and she suckles away. Or so I thought. So I rang my husband two days later and said ‘come pick us up, we can go home’. Now all babies lose approximately 5-7 % of their body weight when they are born, but my daughter lost more than she should have because she wasn’t getting any milk. There it was. I was the worst mother ever created! I could not even feed my own child.( Hormones prevented me from hearing the fact that my milk hadn’t come in and she didn’t have a good latch). I was told I would have to ‘top her up’ with formula, and then a not very nice midwife instructed me in the art of breast-feeding by grabbing my baby and grabbing my boob and forcing them both together – really NOT helpful. By the time my husband got to the hospital to pick us up, I was sitting up in bed, bawling my eyes out, bottle-feeding my daughter and we were not able to go home for another 24 hours.

Now I am nothing if not determined, so I kept trying to feed her and there is a ton of support out there; apart from one bad experience, I have found midwives and health nurses to be wonderful. There are also gadgets to ease the pain. So eventually I got the hang of it and after about 6 weeks (after I recovered from mastitis..) it wasn’t even excruciatingly painful anymore! It was the lovely bonding experience I had heard about. I ended up feeding her for seven months which was brilliant in my book. When my son arrived, I had even more difficulty feeding him, but did not even consider giving up as ‘he must have what his big sister had’. The first eight weeks of his life were incredibly tough because of my bull-headedness – I have no idea how many times my husband suggested that we just switch to formula. This was most likely induced by watching me crying silent tears at the serious pain during feeds. This too passed and I fed him for nine months. Even on my third baby, although I really did have all the techniques down pat at that stage, it was still very painful for the first few weeks. However I did feed her for a year, and it was wonderful – she went straight from me to a beaker of milk.

Now before Cuidiú or La Leche League come after me, I am in fact a true believer that breast- feeding is best for your child, although bottle fed babies survive equally well. However, along with the well-documented benefits, there are some potential obstacles that I wish I had known about before I had my first baby :-

• Getting the latch right is hard – there are some people who ‘get it’ straight away but from my experience the majority of us struggle.
• The left boob is really awkward to feed with, even when I cracked breast-feeding the left boob always required a bit of management. (Presumably the right is the troublesome one if you are left-handed)

• It is painful – even if you get it right straight away – when your milk ‘comes in’ it hurts. A lot! Then there are cracked nipples, blocked ducts, mastitis,etc. just all very ouchy in general!
• You can’t share the load – you are the only one who can feed your child, until you start expressing and belive me that is not a road you want to rush down!
• You have to wear nursing bras – ugly, ugly, ugly – even the pretty ones .
• You can’t just throw on any old top to wear – you have to make sure you have easy access to your breasts at all times.
• Breasts are no longer the epitome of your femininity they are simply, milk machines.
• It is tiring, not only because you are always on call – just the process of feeding always left me feeling drained.
• Getting mastitis when you are recovering from labour and coming to terms with a new baby is, in a word, hell.
• You are hungry all the time – and if, like me, you use that as an excuse to scoff biscuits, scones and cakes then the ‘getting your figure back by breast-feeding’ bonus doesn’t apply.
• You can’t really go out and party, although in truth I did celebrate my 40^th birthday whilst feeding my baby.
• You feel immensely guilty if you can’t ‘get it’ and switch to formula – bloody ridiculous I know – but in our hormonal, post birth heads we are doing our babies a massive disservice.
• Trying to feed your baby discreetly in public is stressful, and then when you get it sorted you get ‘looks’ from others who think you have a burning desire to expose yourself in public!!
  

  Celebrating my 40th!

   

Breast-feeding is natural but it is not necessarily easy or for everyone. So if you decide to feed your child formula milk, enjoy the fact that you are dodging all the aforementioned cons and if you are planning on breast-feeding then take the above as a caveat but please don’t be put off.

Thanks for reading

Aisling

I love feedback , please leave any thoughts or comments below.